Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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