what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
