I swear she didn't look like that last week.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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