i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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