so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
