Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
