They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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