Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
