Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize