i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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