ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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