How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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