I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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