i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Let's get the cat blown out
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Randomize