she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
