He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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