I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
