I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
