it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Everything about him screamed your future.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize