Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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