The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize