Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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