And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
