its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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