There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize