you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
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Do I have a choice?
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Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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