garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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