Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
