Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
