fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
