Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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