either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Randomize
