If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
