It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
