Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
