and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize