it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
