3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize