I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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