fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
