Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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