he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
NoShamevember. You game?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
