doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
