im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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