his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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