i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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