Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize