called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
