her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize