I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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